The profound impact of caffeine

There is such a stark difference in my day after the coffee starts to work. If I had a list of things I want my spouse to do, the number one thing would be to make the coffee in the morning before I was awake so that I can be coherent and pleasant to him. Really, it’s all about him – he deserves a pleasant spouse.

Prior to the caffeine, I can mutter “Good morning” in my most falsely cheerful voice to my dad as he innocently butters an English muffin and tries not to poke the bear. (It doesn’t take much)

Fast forward about an hour, and I’m on the bus (this actually happened today), reading something mildly funny on Facebook and thinking to myself (this actually happened, no lie) LOLSIES. I should comment that. LOLSIES and stifling a giggle.

What happened? Coffee happened, my friends. I also read the holy word of God, but that does not make me giggly. It brings great fulfillment and wisdom and a deeper faith, but it does not provoke giggle attacks.

It got worse when I got to work and had an email waiting for me from a particularly witty co-worker, asking the department to use discretion in the boxes they saved and stacked in the mail room. Like, not keeping ones that could fit a baby hippo or the ones that have been ravaged by other mail stickers. There is a place for such boxes, she says, and it’s not in a stack in the mail room – a stack that becomes increasingly precarious and annoying as more boxes the size of baby hippos are piled in there. It is in the recycling pile. There is someone who will take care of them!

I couldn’t stifle the laugh then. It was too funny, and I was too caffeinated. Thankfully, no one cared. It wasn’t a snort-laugh, and it didn’t echo. I shared my appreciation of the baby hippo comment with the co-worker and went on with my day.

After my afternoon pick-me-up of (you guessed it) coffee, I was able to inform the superior whose project I was working on that no, I wasn’t having fun with it exactly since it wasn’t actually generating the hoped-for results but I was taking enormous enjoyment in the small victories. This made him laugh, and the circle was complete.

If that’s not at least a partial proof that coffee makes the world a better place, then let me know. I have more.

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